Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Defy Gravity

To all you ladies out there who thought your twins were perky enough to poke an eye out, the latest in dumb inventions is taking the girls to new heights - literally.

Push-up bras are so 2009, yoobies are the tit tech of 2010. Yoobies are inflatable inserts that slip into your bra, giving boobs a boost within seconds of pressing a small button on the side. Your set can instantly inflate to desired size and deflate just as easily if it’s a little too much bust than you bargained for.

The website touts that they're as "light as air" - no shit sherlock, this is literally like sticking two balloons up your ta-tas.

Chocolate Bubbies

Vanilla Bubs

Great for every occasion, the mastermind behind these says that chicas may want to keep their Yoobies subtle at the office, but pump them up for happy hour afterwards. Last time I checked, I don't leave work and then throw on my push-up bra to go to happy hour. May I recommend saving your money and splurging on more cocktails instead?

How to tell these are a problem: the website includes a warning that yoobies should not be used as flotation devices. The site also clarifies that they can be worn on airplanes, although I'd bet it must be pretty f*in awkward to have to explain these to airport security.

Fear not all your mosquito-bite-boobed girls or saggy Sallys out there- a full Yoobies Inflatable Bra hits the market next month.

She should be embarassed.

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