For you fools out there who purchased Neuticles, we have yet another pet product for you to waste your money on. Thanks to the latest in ass-inine products, you can now make your pet feel as embarassed as other people feel for you.
"Is your pet feeling left in the dirt because of his/her unsightly rear? I’ve got them covered… Rear Gear is handmade in Portland, OR and offers a cheerful solution to be-rid your favorite pet’s un-manicured back side."
For those fashionistas out there who wouldn't want to cover their dog's dirthole with just a plain old sticker, Rear Gear comes in a variety of designs. The possibilities are endless - smiley face, disco ball, heart, flower AND even a cupcake for those of you who want small children to try to taste your dog's backside.
If she can't even bear the sight of it, why is this pervy girl okay with having her head so close to her dog's tush? More imporantly, when did Miley Cyrus and Jennifer Aniston have a baby?
Chris Hardwick with The Nerdist says it best:
"Tired of staring at your dog’s ugly crap crevice? Well slap a sticker over that winker!
Whether you’re trying to conceal unsightly puckering or reduce temptation for your weird dog anus fetish, Rear Gear has a butthole cover for YOU. What happens when your dog starts pooping? I dunno! But I imagine it would be somewhat similar to having someone push a cake under a door and into a carpet. I guess you’d have to get one and then wait patiently while creepily focused on your dog’s ass with an unblinking eye to find out for sure.
Thanks, Rear Gear! This might motivate me to finally make a lipstick cap for awkward dog boners."